• 3-minute read
  • 20th July 2018

How to Procrastinate and Get Nothing Done

Are you getting too much work done? Would you rather spend your time worrying about deadlines? If so, follow our guide on how to procrastinate and watch your productivity drop instantly!

The circle of procrastination.

1. Don’t Plan Anything

If you really want to get nothing done, the last thing you need is a plan. After all, planning your working day will help you manage your time effectively and give you a sense of your overall progress.

Instead, take on various tasks at random, regardless of how important or difficult they might be. If you’re lucky, you’ll get bogged down in something pointless and complex!

2. Find a Chaotic Environment

It is much easier to be productive if you have a calm and controlled work environment. Ideally, this should be somewhere quiet and comfortable, with everything you need easily accessible nearby.

However, if you’re looking to procrastinate, we suggest doing your work somewhere busy, uncomfortable, and noisy, such as a coffee shop during the lunchtime rush or a busy airport lounge.

Yup. This seems like a good place to get work done.
(Photo: Josh Hallett/flickr)

3. Check Twitter Constantly

It goes without saying that social media is much more interesting than work. After all, why would you want to do anything useful when you could procrastinate by spending hours arguing with anonymous online strangers about whether Marvel or DC make the best superhero movies?

And don’t forget that there is more to the internet than just Twitter and Facebook! There are literally thousands of ways to waste time online, so the procrastination opportunities are infinite.

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You can run, but your followers will find you eventually!
(Image: Alan O’Rourke)

4. Blame Yourself

Perhaps you’re already behind with your work. Well, now is the time to self-recriminate for your lack of productivity. By focusing on what you should have done so far instead of what you could do next, you can guarantee that you won’t get anything useful done soon!

5. Try to Do Everything by Yourself

When people work together, they are much more likely to get stuff done. And if you can ask a friend or a colleague for help with something difficult, you will find it much easier to achieve your goals.

This is why the true procrastinator always works alone. If you try to take on every task by yourself with no assistance from anyone, any progress you do make will be slow and stressful.

A Final Piece of Advice…

Of course, if you actually want to get some work done, we recommend doing the opposite to everything we’ve said above. So, if you want to avoid procrastination, you can:

  1. Plan your work carefully and break it down into simple steps
  2. Create a calm, disturbance-free environment
  3. Use a website blocker to limit your access to online distractions
  4. Reward yourself for good behavior and forgive yourself for mistakes
  5. Don’t be afraid to ask for support!

And remember that we’re here to help with proofreading, letting you focus on the important stuff.

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